Hugo swung his legs to the floor and sat up. What a night! The party lasted into the wee hours and by the time he’d stumbled home; he passed out on the couch, never making it into his bed. His head ached, and thirst clogged his throat.
He belched. The stench of alcohol and the pong of a dirty ashtray perfumed the air. He fumbled for his cigarettes, rifling through his pockets, on the hunt for his lighter. He retrieved a pack from his shirt pocket and found it empty. His anger erupted. He balled up the packet and threw it across the room.
“Hey, quit throwing stuff at me!”
“What?” Hugo’s bleary eyes tried to focus, but he couldn’t see straight.
He staggered toward the open window and gasped. Like an old-timey movie reel, grainy images flickered on a silver screen. After his bloodshot eyes cleared, he observed what looked to be his house, precariously perched in the crook of a massive tree. A glaring of cats roamed across the roof, and an elephant stared him in the face.
“Yeah, I’m talking to you.”
With eyes the size of saucers, Hugo shook his head. “Elephants don’t talk,” he wheezed out.
“Well, this one does. I’m your conscious. Wikipedia says:
“Conscience is an aptitude, faculty, intuition or judgment that assists in distinguishing right from wrong. Moral judgment may derive from values or norms. In psychological terms conscience is often described as leading to feelings of remorse when a human commits actions that go against his/her moral values and to feelings of rectitude or integrity when actions conform to such norms.”
“Did you just define my conscious?” Hugo ran his hands nervously through his hair.
“Sure. How many did you have last night? Do you feel any remorse?”
“Too many to count. And, no, I don’t feel any guilt at my having had a good time. Now, leave me alone!”
“I bet you drank “Green Faeries,” again last night,” said the elephant. A grin stretched across his face.
Hugo closed his eyes and swayed in place. Damn absinthe! No wonder I can’t focus.
“Now do you feel guilty?” The elephant extended his long trunk toward the window. He nosed Hugo’s shoulder.
Hugo raised his shaking hand to his damp forehead. His heartbeat raced, and he shivered as if the heat of the day chilled him to the bone.
“What have you done with my house? What’s the deal with the cats?” asked Hugo.
The elephant’s nasal voice dissolved into laughter. “It’s the delirium tremors, my friend. Stick around, we’ve got a big show planned for you.”
***
This story was created from two sources. One, D. Wallace Peach’s monthly writing challenge, and two; this post from The Dark Netizen. I laughed the entire time I wrote this story. Thanks for the inspiration, you guys! 😀
Learn more about the Green Faery HERE.
Very funny!
LOL! Everyone knows I love faeries… so this was a blast to write! 🤣
I can see you had fun sis 💜
What a riot, Colleen. I have to try absinthe and see what happens. 🙂 Poor Hugo and his elephant-sized conscience. Seeing an elephant isn’t too bad, but the “big show” is a little intimidating. Thanks so much for taking up the prompt. That was a lot of fun. 🙂
LOL! I’m blaming it on the dark netizen! I got the green fairy from him! LOL! What fun! 🤣🥂 Cheers! 🧚♀️🧚♀️🧚♀️
Ha ha! At least the elephant didn’t wear pink.
LOL 😂 I toyed with that idea but figured a regular elephant was just as terrifying! This was so fun to write!
It was fun to read too.
Thanks, Craig. ❤️
This is great fun, Colleen!! Of course now I have Jiminey Cricket singing “Always let your conscience be your guide”, stuck in my head! 🤣
Ha, ha! That’s hysterical! 🤣🤣🤣 🦗🤣
Tell my brain that!! 🤣🤣🤣
Nice plot. A man’s conscience catches up with him in a state of delirium.
LOL! Guilt is a powerful motivator! 🤣❤️
Ah, yes… coffee through my nose, does not taste as good as coffee through my mouth. Fun stuff here, Sis! 🙂
LOL! Your humor inspired me! <3
What fun! Thanks for the smiles Colleen.
LOL! Thanks, Balroop. <3
Lol funny and entertaining, well written Sis <3
Ha! 🤣🤣🤣 It was a product of inspiration. Great fun! Thanks, Sis. ❤️
Seems you are full of inspiration these days <3
LOL! I try! 😀 <3
<3
Reblogged this on Myths of the Mirror and commented:
A last-minute story from Colleen, the fairy whisperer, but well worth the share. I hope you enjoy!
Thanks, Diana for sharing. I’ve been in my writing cave and had your challenge on my calendar not to forget. You make me spread my wings and embrace the impossible. <3
I’m so delighted that you took up the prompt, Colleen. Next month I think will be a bit easier on everyone. Ha ha. I hope you participate again!
I’d be happy to. It keeps me thinking in different directions. <3
This was a funny one, Colleen!
LOL! Thanks, Teri. I’m glad you enjoyed it. Ha, HA! 😀
Oooooo, I like this story, despite the memories of my college days that it brings to mind.
LOL! Thank you. I had great fun writing this. 😀
Delightful story Colleen! Poor Hugo, waking up to talking elephants. 🙂 That must be some powerful absinthe!
LOL! This story was so fun to write. Speculative fiction is quite freeing. 😀 Thanks.
My pleasure. Maybe it’s time for me to try writing short stories.
I love flash fiction too. Writing these stories make us better writers. <3
Good one! (K)
LOL! Glad you got a laugh. 😀
Lol! Had a hwarty chickle reading this. The quote from wiki even seemed rightfully placed – great little comedy!
Thanks, H. I had no idea what a green fairy was. When I looked it up, well it all came together. <3
Hugo better stay away from the Green Faery, lol
I’ll say. I thought the elephant was hysterical. Do you ever wonder what rolls out of your brain? LOL! <3
What a fun story Colleen
Really enjoyed. 🙂
Thanks, Marje. It was great fun. <3
Loved this, sis. The Green Faery leading people astray again. <3
LOL! I didn’t know what it was until I looked it up. You know, anything faery is attracted to me and before I knew it, the story practically wrote itself. LOL! <3
<3 <3
LOL loved it! Too much drink makes it hard to think 😉
🤣🤣🤣
Faery well done 😉
LOL! 🤣❤️🧚♀️
Hahaha, green indeed! I think I might be too if I even sniffed absinthe… 🥴
A good laugh.
LOL! Thanks, Jessica. 🤢🤣
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Those Green Faeries..absinthe.. and tequila no doubt…..great story Colleen.. hugs
LOL! Thanks, Sally. I’m glad it gave you a laugh. <3
♥